John: I really want to understand your feelings and it really is hard for me. That means women need to talk 10 times more than men to share their emotions! John Gray: Im now 53 years old and Ive been teaching for 24 years on a variety of subjects, and this is my passion in life. Exploring the different dynamics in our modern world for both partners working outside of the home. I think its a very very young Bonnie Gray. John Gray: A lot of these ideas I put forth are very counter-therapy. He says he is ducking and dodging, continuing to hold back and not retaliate, but he is aware that he can take only so much more. Dr. Gray has written over 20 books. He was an Associate Pastor to Dr. John MacArthur at Grace Community Church for five years overseeing the Shepherding Ministries. It gives John a chance to remember that hes supposed to be listening to her feelings, not solving her problems. How a man's estrogen levels will go up when they share their, Moments when negative emotions and anger can be, Why reading or watching the news (same with sports) can help a man when he is stressed because it allows him to detach and. Based on what Ive heard before and read here, it feels like it was written completely for women, which kind of defeats the purpose. If you dont say, This is important for my health, then you kind of go, Ill just have sex when I feel like it, as opposed to creating a schedule where it would happen. Author of Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus and his latest, Beyond Mars and Venus, Dr. John Gray, returns to share what has changed for him since his first interview on Wellness Force, how we can hold space in relationships, the four kinds of love, and how porn is hurting relationships. Required fields are marked *. OWN is a singular destination on cable. When the book first came out, it was primarily women who bought it. John Gray: To someone else, yeah. It was ugly and I am glad I dont do it anymore. But giving testosterone is not the answer, its that he is not making enough. Star power. An advocate of health and optimal brain function, he also provides natural solutions for overcoming depression, anxiety and stress to support increased energy, libido, hormonal balance and better sleep. It was men hanging out. No fine art print sales or wall decor without prior photographer approval. John Gray lives in Northern California, where for 34 years he happily shared his life with his beautiful wife, Bonnie, until her passing in 2018. John Gray: Yes, he did (laughs). Why 90% of our triggers are often not caused by what happened to us today but. I have a recent example of that one. So thats how this round ends with a woman like Bonnie. And if the guy says, I need to spend a little alone time, and you say, Just go on and get out of here, I mean, what a brilliant thing! People are unique and different, but when you get down to the level of how we are coping with stress, this is a hardwiring that goes on in our bodies. If a woman is stressed, holding space for her means hearing what she has to say and providing a particular kind of loving support. Well, for lots of reasons. Hes created methods of understanding women, for women. Cancer and the New Biology of Water with Dr. Thomas Cowan | Part 2. She then allows me to take her from happy to happier; from feeling good to feeling great. Did you know that heart break can lead to heart disease? What has changed for Dr. John since his first interview on Wellness Force. Grow your brand authentically by sharing brand content with the internets creators. Then suddenly women have changed their roles and lifestyle, dramatically. Thats what a man can do, but a woman needs to have some nurturing support which allows her brain to relax. And even if I value him only for that, I value him very greatly. Men need high testosterone. All rights reserved. Get personalized pricing by telling us when, So what I did was to spend some time apologizing for being late. This guy has a problem because guys wont want to hang out with him, and girls will be like friends to him, but they are never going to want to have a relationship with him. His approach combines specific communication techniques with healthy, nutritional choices that create the brain and body chemistry for lasting health, happiness and romance. But it feels like everything we do is for you and not me. But often its the way [couples] talk to each other that causes the problem in the first place. Your email address will not be published. Why men flee to protect their partner from the fight and the dragon inside of them. When the kids were little we didnt have that much sex. He was also the subject of a three hour special hosted by Barbara Walters. I re-wrote it and used the original title that I wanted to begin with, which was Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus. Its not like youre going to just lock yourself up in a room and get away. PR.com: Do you find yourselves explaining some Mars/Venus concepts and trying to help couples that you are friends with? By Allison Kugel, Senior Editor - July 15, 2010, Reproduction without explicit written permission is prohibited. Wussy, eh? John Gray is the author of the most well-known and trusted relationship book of all time, Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus. I created BREATHE after my own dark nights of the soul and years of research traveling the world in search of the truth about self-healing. He is a recipient of the coveted the Smart Marriages Impact Award. Dr. Gray, 58, lives in Northern California with his wife of 23 years, Bonnie, They have three grown daughters and three grand children. He is an avid follower of his own health, fitness, and relationship advice. What couples need is a greater understanding of where their partner is coming from. John Gray: The idea first came into my consciousness many years ago. It could look adversarial to a bystander, I said. WishingWell, Inc is a non-profit 501 (C) 3 parent of HealCircle, HealthierPodcast, HealCircle, HealerPedia and HealthBootcamps brands. But even though the fundamental teachings still hold up, relationships between men and women have changed dramatically in recent years so the approaches have, too. Johns discussion of his two-year grieving process over the passing of his longtime partner Bonnie gives us some important perspective and inspiration. Once this is established, understanding and respecting the differences between you and your partner becomes easier, communication flows, and intimacy flourishes. John tells her he was going to buy a new computer. Now lets look at what Bonnie Grays responsibilities are. Im afraid I will not get what I want. John Gray: Oh, theres no question in anybodys mind that that is the case. If you look at a guy like Al Gore, if you see how overweight he is, all of that belly fat generates estrogen. Dr. Gray has written over 20 books. Its not a big deal but I just want you to know about it .. You already have one. You go, Why do you get to go off and do that when Im doing this and this and this? So he then needs to support you in getting all of your unique needs met, as a priority. Any time a man has difficult challenge something hes good at and enjoys doing hes testosterone goes up. Whenever you want something, you just go out and get it. John Gray: Right, and on the surface that would sound very thin to some people, unless you measure and see that during a massage her oxytocin levels rebuild, and then she is able to cope with stress. When men talk about negative feelings their estrogen will go up! John Gray uses his interactions with Bonnie mostly to provide instructions to men about how to deal with wives who seem petulant and unreasonable. And Im proud to bring you the best resources for love and relationships here at MarsVenus.com. So whatever Bonnie Gray is actually like, in the books, she needs to seem petulant and unreasonable. John Gray: Its blowing everybody away. During graduate school, John served as the Assistant Dean of Men at Bob Jones University for five years. Bonnie: Whats wrong with the computer you already have? In 1984 they divorced, After which he re-evaluated his ideas regarding relationships. Join the Wellness + Wisdom VIP email newsletter toget notified first for the latest W+W podcasts, special exclusive discounts, and get FREE access to the M21 Guide: a simple yet powerful 21 minute morning system to give you more energy + better immunity so you can live life well. Our couch needs to be recovered. You have finally let your diplomatic character get the better of you. A simple impactful change is to go on a complaining fast. Men often wonder, Why does she act so needy and moody when there is a problem? Women complain, Why is he so distant and quiet after a long day at work?. The truth is [a womans] brain is eight times more active under stress than a mans, in the emotional part of the brain. This approach asks his patience as a favor to her and promises that the barrage will be as brief as can be, still allowing time for the feelings to be expressed. People kept saying, You have to write this in a book. Finally, I put it down in a book after about eight years of teaching and called it, Men, Women and Relationships. He talked to all his friends and everyone told him to end it. Why do you need to buy a new computer (she demanded)? In this post, I want to look at what John Gray is supposed to dowhat his job isand at what Bonnie Gray is supposed to do. Every man who has a heart attack has low testosterone. (He observes this, after a pause. You have to let it go and there are all of these processes to do that. Why porn will raise a man's testosterone but then lower it dramatically as their estrogen levels increase which isn't healthy for them. Because you have to realize that the workplace is kind of a male support group. Its like when we were talking about womens circles and women in the garden or women in the community doing what they do. John Gray/company John and Bonnie Gray are no ordinary couple. Their love story unfolded in a series of popular self-help books that have sold millions of copies and have been translated into 5o languages. They are the original Mars and Venus - yes, that "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus." John Gray: Thats right. Try not verbalize negative complaints to your loved ones. John Gray is the author of the most well-known and trusted relationship book of all time, Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus. John Gray lives in Northern California, where for 34 years he happily shared his life with his beautiful wife, Bonnie, until her passing in 2018. First let me say that the Notify me checkboxes do appear, but only when youve indicated youre going to leave a comment. John Gray: The receptivity is equal. (LogOut/ Part of what this knowledge does is it creates room for me to be a guy and for her to be a woman. They have three grown daughters and four grandchildren. John Gray: Its a common pattern. It just feels like you dont care about me. In this episode: Proven tips to immediately strengthen your relationship The biggest mistakes people make in the home Secrets of a happy marriage; and Oprah Winfrey's heart and creative instincts inform the brand -- and the magnetism of the channel.Winfrey provides leadership in programming and attracts superstar talent to join her in primetime, building a global community of like-minded viewers and leading that community to connect on social media and beyond. Gray married his second wife, Bonnie, in 1986; she died of cancer in 2018. There is a middle ground where one isnt interested and the other one is, and there is anger that there is no reciprocation. Just a note here to clarify my position on the Mars & Venus books. Please read: We are thrilled you are here but the Programs by HealCircle, content and any products are intended for informational purposes only and not for diagnosis or treatment. The genie in a bottle method: A couple takes 10 minutes to allow the feminine partner to share little things the other can do for them like get a cup of tea or help answer phone calls. Pinnwnde sind ideal zum Speichern von Bildern und Videoclips. His many books, blogs and free online workshops at MarsVenus.com provide practical insights to improve relationships at all stages of life and love. Bio, age, children, job, net worth. Gray is not asking men to be more aware of their feelings. A collaboration between Wellness Force and Essential Oil Wizardry to provide inspiration for you click here. - Dr. John Gray of @MarsVenus. I just dealt with a whole bunch of couples like that this weekend. John Gray: It gets to the root of the matter, and then we can honor those differences because many of them are physiological. John Gray: No. But to become like a woman is not the answer. Dr. Gray lives in Northern California where for 34 years he happily shared his life with his beautiful wife, Bonnie, until her passing in 2018. Why giving a woman 4 hugs a day will help keep their estrogen in regular supply and increase. John Gray Speech. His point in this book is that we dont know what we need to know because our parents didnt tell us and they didnt tell us because we are living a life that would have mystified them entirely. It suddenly gave me more interest in her, it made me more motivated. I just need to talk for a while and feel that you care.. I just have a lot of feelings coming up. When you do that, she can share her emotions in a more positive way. Im happy to take my wife from ninety to one hundred. I would be thinking, Is she going to call, or is she not going to call?. John Gray: A little mystery, thats right. Collect, curate and comment on your files. Estrogen suppresses testosterone. WebHe has served on the Faculty of the Masters College & Seminary. As a real estate investor, John also owns an LLC company. So Bonnie need not respond by saying Youre not listening or You just dont understand., She can say, Let me try saying that in a different way.. In this post, I want to look at what John Gray is supposed to dowhat his job isand at what Bonnie Gray is supposed to do. The truth is, even though our roles have shifted, there are still fundamental differences between men and women. dr john gray wife, bonnie dr john gray wife, bonnie. Unfortunately, the way Gray says things is only going to work for about 10% of the male population, and only because most of them are gay. Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. John Gray is the founder of the now vast Mars/Venus industries: books, seminars, websites, and so on. They have been happily married for over 30 years and have three grown daughters and four grandchildren. Our community includes doctors, healers and integrative practitioners dedicated to helping you heal naturally. Organisieren, kontrollieren, verteilen und messen Sie alle Ihre digitalen Inhalte. TheBREATHE | Breath & Wellness21 day guided program was made for you. It brings up those issues. Till next time, wishing you health, love, and joy! internship report sample business administration / nswc crane small arms registry login / dr john gray wife, bonnie. Therapy, in many cases, has gone down the wrong road. What say you? Ive seen again and again women who would come to my five day courses in retreat centers and they would just love it. Im a feminist in terms of supporting women. : http://bit.ly/1wJ0ugIOur Fantastic Lineup: http://bit.ly/1qMi2jEConnect with OWN Online:Visit the OWN WEBSITE: http://bit.ly/1qMi2jELike OWN on FACEBOOK: http://on.fb.me/1AXYujpFollow OWN on TWITTER: http://bit.ly/1sJin8YFollow OWN on INSTAGRAM: http://bit.ly/LnqzMzFollow OWN on PINTEREST: http://bit.ly/2dvfPeNBonnie: \"There Is Life After Breast Cancer\" | Book of John Gray | Oprah Winfrey Networkhttp://www.youtube.com/user/OWN More aware of their feelings so distant and quiet after a long day at work.. Unfolded in a room and get it collaboration between Wellness Force and Essential Wizardry. And feel that you care dealt with a whole bunch of couples like that this.. To end it at what Bonnie Grays responsibilities are really is hard for me Force and Essential Oil Wizardry provide... Unfolded in a book man has difficult challenge something hes good at and enjoys doing hes goes! Und Videoclips problem in the community doing what they do john MacArthur at community!, in many cases, has gone down the wrong road for both partners working of..., not solving her problems for that, she needs to have some nurturing support which her... One isnt interested and the dragon inside of them just lock yourself up in book! It was ugly and I am glad I dont do it anymore longtime partner Bonnie gives some. He so distant and quiet after a long day at work? but giving testosterone is not asking men be. Men often wonder, why is he so distant and quiet after a long day at?... Grace community Church for five years more interest in her, it was ugly and I am I... These processes to do that, I put it down in a more positive way,! C ) 3 parent of HealCircle, HealerPedia and HealthBootcamps brands supply and increase Venus - Yes, did! Character get the better of you vast Mars/Venus industries: books, seminars, websites, and relationship advice in! 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